If you've got a nervous system and a partner, this course is for you. Healing happens in relationship, and your partnership has the potential to provide a mirror, a foundation of support, a rupture of your neural expectations (that which you think always happens when you do X or Y), and a reliable reminder that you are safe in the world. You can provide this for your partner, too. But when we are busy making one another the enemy, reenacting our past, projecting our wounds, or stuck in a hamster wheel of reactivity and/or swallowed emotions, we miss out on the gift and opportunity that a relationship offers us.
Understanding the wisdom of the nervous system allows us to infuse our relationships with safety, meaning, and connection. This material will teach you how to identify your own autonomic state, identify your partner's state, lean into and amplify your body's natural process of biological connection, downshift out of defense, and come into resonance with each other. It's only from resonance that listening, support, meaning, and healing can occur.
If you and your partner struggle to see each other with the soft eyes of nonjudgment, to connect deeply and meaningfully, to communicate without shutting down or getting annoyed, or to honor and hold space for each other's truth, Polyvagal Partnership can help. If you know deep down that your partnership is capable of creating more beauty, more love, and more change in this world, then you are in the right place. Welcome to Polyvagal Partnership.

Sample video from the course:


Polyvagal Theory

What it is, why it matters, and how to apply it to relationships. Discover defense patterns, safety triggers, and state identification.

Somatic Inquiry

Learn how your body echoes your relationship and your own neurodevelopment. Learn to use inquiry as a guidepost.

The Partner Brain

How to amplify your body's natural wiring toward love. Learn to navigate the systems involved in being a responsive partner.

Polyvagal Toolbox

Practice a wide variety of somatic tools that elicit co-regulation,  connection, communication, exploration, and expansion. 

Topics also include:

  • enemy-making vs. meaning-making
  • clean language of inquiry
  • the brain-wide mirroring system
  • rigidity, active yield, and collapse
  • circles of energy
  • the four neural pathways of healthy relationships
  • developing shared language and short-hand signals
  • how to repair a break 
  • the dangers of isolation, silent treatment, and avoidance
  • primitive vs. ambassador communication
  • the role of commitment
  • how to self-regulate before you co-regulate
  • relational improvisation and the role of creativity
  • breath, movement, and touch

What's included?

Video Icon 6 videos File Icon 10 files


WEEK ONE: A primer on Polyvagal Theory
39 mins
The Ladder of Activation
206 KB
Common characteristics of each state
260 KB
Homework: your characteristics
145 KB
Homework: your partner's characteristics
147 KB
WEEK TWO: Biology-based connective strategies
34 mins
Notes from slides
3.7 MB
WEEK THREE: The couple bubble
34 mins
Notes from slides and homework
3.7 MB
WEEK FOUR: The four neural pathways of relationship
47 mins
Notes from slides
3.7 MB
WEEK FIVE: Neuromotor healing and somatic inquiry
48 mins
Notes from slides
3.7 MB
Circles of Energy mp3
5 mins
WEEK SIX: Co-regulation
24 mins
Notes from slides
3.7 MB


1) Can I take this if I don't have a partner?

Sure! If you would like to take it, take it! You will definitely prepare yourself for an easier navigation of relationships in the future. You'll miss out on practicing the tools during the course (unless you grab a bestie to try it out), but you will learn a ton.

2) Can I take this if I have a successful relationship?

Yes! Doing these practices will positively affect your way of relating and allow you to go even deeper. There's always more to feel and express together.

3) Will this course fix my marriage?

The short answer is no. This course will only provide you with knowledge, tools, and the opportunity to practice those tools.